cooking brisket: 2006

Holiday Fantasy Fudge

Steve loves my mother's fudge recipe. Actually everyone I've ever given fudge to has loved my mother's fudge recipe. The secret is that she found it years ago on the back of a Marshmallow Fluff jar. They've since changed their recipe, but mom's remains the same.

Ingredients:

3 cups sugar
3/4 cup margarine
1 can (5 oz.) evaporated milk
1 pkg. (12 oz.) semisweet chocolate pieces
1 jar (7 oz.) marshmallow crème
1 cup chopped nuts (optional if you're not making it for my father!)
1 tsp. vanilla

Instructions:

Combine sugar, margarine and milk in heavy 2 to 3-quart saucepan. Bring to a full rolling boil, stirring constantly.

Continue boiling 5 minutes over medium heat or until candy thermometer reaches 234° F., stirring constantly to prevent scorching. Remove from heat.

Stir in chocolate pieces until melted.

Add marshmallow crème, nuts and vanilla. Beat until well blended.

Pour into a greased 13-by-9-inch pan.

Cool at room temperature. Cut into squares.

aaaah a LONG Holiday Weekend....

I can’t believe it’s finally here! A long weekend – full of no work (that I’m going to be doing at my office anyway), lots of laughter, and my parents! Wahoo! I am totally excited! My parents know me better than anyone else (well…. about most things but we won’t go into that…. Tee hee hee) and they always seem to know just what it takes to get me to relax and just ‘be’. I am so excited to be able to take the time and do that this weekend.

Christmas started to happen at my house – finally. Honestly, I didn’t think it would happen, but it did – and I am SO glad. No, the big tree isn’t up this year, but I do have my little German tree, and it’s loaded with all kinds of things that remind me of my German Christmas’s growing up. It’s in our entry way, and it’s there to see me off in the morning, and greet me when I come home each night. The stockings are hung (all 9 of them) and are awaiting the magic that fills them up on Christmas Eve (and boy are there fun things to fill them up with!). There are baskets and plates filled with red, gold, white, and clear glittery, sparkly ornaments popping up here and there. Christmas cards and other holiday greetings have filled our mantle to overflowing – we are so blessed!

The ingredients have been purchased to make our holiday ‘take arounds” for our neighbors and friends (some who are as close as family!). Mom and I will head to Wally World to pick up a few things so that she can make her famous hot fudge recipe (yum!) and we’ll drop that off to one of her dearest friends – hopefully we’ll be able to pop over and visit another one of them too.

My shopping is as done as it’s going to be. I’m sure I’ll find a few things to add to the bounty. I can’t wait to see the faces of some of our guests – I think they’ll really love their gifts, or at least I hope so. A lot of work and thought went into them. Mom and I plan to go and visit IKEA tomorrow, and I never leave without spending a few more dollars than I had planned. We’ll probably stop by Burlington Coat Factory and Kohl’s because, well quite honestly they are some of her favorite shopping places – and they don’t have them in Farmington where they live.

Our Christmas Eve dinner has been planned out, homemade Mexican Style (chicken enchiladas, tamales, rice, homemade refried beans, guacamole, etc – maybe even a little queso dip for good measure). Christmas Breakfast (hash brown casserole, French toast casserole and cranberry scones) and our Christmas Day dinner is ready to be shopped for and finished (both turkey and ham, mashed potatoes, frog eye salad, homemade Beste bread –YUM!!, Christmas cheesecake, and a few vegi’s for good measure). Food will definitely be plentiful, and I’ll probably gain a few pounds, but over the holidays I don’t mind. It’ll jump start me into my body toning plan for next year. It’ll be a big hurrah before I go on my healthy food run.

A quick thought that touched me this season:

"For a few moments, may we set aside the catalogs of Christmas, with their gifts of exotic description. Let's even turn from the flowers for Mother, the special tie for Father, the cute doll, the train that whistles, the long-awaited bicycle—even the books and videos—and direct our thoughts to God-given gifts that endure." ~ Thomas S. Monson

Sadly, so much of Christmas is commercialized. One of the greatest things my parents ever decided to do was only give us 3 gifts at Christmas (of course, this was after we all knew Santa's secret), just as Jesus recieved 3 gifts - one from each wisemen. I think it really helped us remember why we celebrate and remember such an important day. I think Steve and I will likely do the same.

A Little Bit of Christmas Heaven

Since I haven't been able to get any holiday baking done (yet), I went shopping for a few holiday treats to tide us over (yeah... US.... riiiiight...). What did my eyes behold, and NOT at Easter time? Be still my heart.... Cadbury Chocolate Balls! Oh My Stars and Bananas! I was in chocolate heaven! I bought 3 bags, and have forbidden Steve from touching them! (You can normally only find these delectible treasures at Easter, in the shape of an egg. Finding them at Christmas was my own little tasty Christmas miracle!)

AAAND.... if you're a candycane or chocolate lover, you simply must try a bag of the new Hersheys Candy Cane Kisses. WOW..... they are SOOOO yummy! THey're starting to become hard to find (and my area is totally sold out - Mom and Dad are going to try and find some out in NM to tide me over - or get me out of this phase.)

I wish that both of these yummies were made into tiny treats so that I could turn them into incredible cookies - especially those cadbury chocolates! They're SOOOOO melt in your mouth yummy!

With treats like this around, I might never bake again!

Prayer Request

Updated: Ainsley and Bekki are home from the hospital. It turns out that little Ainsley's lungs couldn't absorb enough oxygen, so she was doing a lot of wheezing. After Bek gave her a few breathing treatments and not seeing results, she took her to the ER (where she works) and asked her doctor friend what he thought. He thought it would be best to check her into the hospital - and it's a good thing! Little Ainsley's lungs needed some special stuff and steroids to get them processing right. (that would be my non-medical interpretation of Bekki's medical explaination to me).

So glad that they're home and Ainsley is babbling and grunting away. She, by the way, has decided that talking in a comprehendable language is highly overrated and that grunting is the way of the future. Too bad that Bekki doesn't think the same way! :)

Thank you for your prayers, well wishes, and heartfelt thoughts! I have a firm testimony in the power of prayer and the help/miracles it can bring!

My sweet, darling, and tender niece, Ainsley, is in the hospital with some breathing problems. She's had breathing problems in the past, but it's really bad this time. If you could add her to your prayers, I would really appreciate it.

My sister, Bekki, is a RN (so nice and handy), and has been able to take care of Ainsleys treatments in the past. But this time she needs more help. She's been staying with her at the hospital night and day. Prayers on her behalf and for the other kids (Arissa and Micheal) and their dad (Shaun)would be great too!

Thanks!

Lemon-Butter Red Potatoes

This is another recipe is from Heather D. White – I told you she NEVER steers me wrong!

Ingredients:
10-15 red potatoes, quartered
1/3 C. butter (no substitutes)
2 T. olive oil
1/3 C. lemon juice
3 T. fresh chives, minced (or 1 ½ T. dried)
2 T. fresh parsley, minced (or 1 T. dried)
1 T. grated lemon peel
1 tsp. salt
¼ tsp. pepper
¼ tsp. nutmeg

Instructions:
Place potatoes in a large saucepan and cover with water. Cover the saucepan and bring to a boil. Cook for 15-20 minutes or until tender. In a small saucepan, heat butter over medium heat for 2-3 minutes or until lightly browned (the browning gives it the flavor). Remove from the heat; stir in remaining ingredients. Drain potatoes and toss with lemon butter. Serve and enjoy!

Crock Pot Cranberry Pork Roast

This recipe is from someone I served on the Rusty Pickle Design Team with, and is someone whose recipes have NEVER failed me – the fabulous and creative Heather D. White! Steve and I really love this recipe!

Ingredients:
1 pork loin roast (2 ½ - 3 lbs.)(can be boneless or not)

1 can (16 oz.) jellied whole cranberries

1 C. dried cranberries

½ C. sugar

½ C. cranberry juice or ½ C. orange juice

1 tsp. dry mustard

¼ tsp. ground cloves

2 T. cornstarch

2 T. cold water

Instructions:
Place pork roast bone side down in a slow cooker/crock pot. In a medium bowl, mash cranberry sauce. Stir in sugar, cranberry juice, orange juice, mustard and cloves. Pour over roast. Cover and cook on high for 6-8 hours. If boneless, cook on low for 6-8 hours. Cook until meat is tender. Remove roast and keep warm. Skim fat from juices; measure 2 cups, adding water if necessary and pour into a saucepan. Bring to a boil over medium heat. Combine cornstarch and cold water to make a paste; stir into gravy. Cook and stir until thickened. Season with salt. Serve with sliced pork.

A great dish to accompany this is the Lemon-Butter Red Potatoes (also from Heather D. White!)

Hawaiian Bread (Bread Maker Recipe)

I’m a huge fan of Kings Hawaiian Bread. I can eat a whole package (and of course make myself sick in the process) by myself. I decided that it was high time I find a way to make it myself. This is a combination of recipes, and it’s worked out well for me."

INGREDIENTS:

1/2 cup mashed banana
1/2 cup crushed pineapple, with juice
1 egg
1/4 cup milk
1/4 cup margarine, softened
1 teaspoon coconut extract
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/3 cup white sugar
1/2 cup instant potato flakes
3 cups bread flour
1 1/2 teaspoons active dry yeast

Instructions:

Place ingredients in the pan of the bread machine in the order recommended by the manufacturer. Select Light setting; press Start. :)

Portuguese Sweet Bread (Bread Maker Recipe)

My previous roommate, Christa, brought home some Portuguese bread home with her from New England. It was beyond delicious and before we knew it, all of the bread she had brought home was gone. I started hunting for a recipe that would work, and this has finally filled need. It’s definitely a sweet bread, and is very good with salad fillings – especially chicken salad! Yum!

INGREDIENTS:
1 cup milk
1 egg
2 tablespoons margarine
1/3 cup white sugar
3/4 teaspoon salt
3 cups bread flour
2 1/2 teaspoons active dry yeast

DIRECTIONS:
Add ingredients in order suggested by your manufacturer. Select "sweet bread" setting.

NOTES:

Depending on your altitude and humidity level you may need to add more yeast or flour. My east coast friends use 1 standard package of yeast (2&1/4 tsp) instead of 2 & 1/2 teaspoons called for in the recipe.
I will sometimes use this bread as a base recipe and add in 1/4 c. of finely chopped coconut, 1 teaspoon of coconut extract and use coconut milk in place of the milk to make a coconut variation. Another twist I use with this bread is to add 1/4 c. of crystallize ginger and 2 tsp. of Lemon juice to the recipe.
If you’re a real sugar lover, (or just like your bread sweeter than it already is) add about six packets of aspartame (Sweet 'N Low) to the recipe. I know that might sound funny, but if you just add more sugar, the bread crust becomes really dark. Don't use NutraSweet; NutraSweet doesn't hold up under high temperatures and therefore is not useful for baking.

More Recipes...

A few of you have requested some of my holiday recipes, the yummy Ohio Buckeyes for starters. I've started loading my Christmas holiday recipes into my recipe blog. You can find the address over on the toolbar on the right side. I'm getting ready to load a few bread recipes now!

Ohio Buckeyes

These chocolate yummies are VERY popular in Ohio - aka the Buckeye State. In fact, that's where I learned to make them! You generally see it available during the Christmas holiday season, or at Buckeye Tailgate parties! If you're a Reece's Peanut Butter candy lover, you'll be in heaven!

Ingredients:

1 ½ cups creamy peanut butter
½ cup butter, softened
1 t. vanilla extract
4 c. sifted confectioners (powdered) sugar (a little over a whole box)
10 ounces semi sweet chocolate chips (or the whole bag)
2 T. shortening

Instructions:

Line a baking sheet with waxed paper; set aside.

In a medium bowl, mix peanut butter, butter, vanilla, and confectioners' sugar you’re your hands to form a smooth stiff dough. (at first you can use a mixer, but it will get too stiff to use your mixer with. Shape the dough into balls using 2 teaspoons of dough for each ball. Place on prepared pan, and refrigerate.

Melt shortening and chocolate together in a metal bowl over a pan of lightly simmering water. Stir occasionally until smooth, and remove from heat.

Remove balls from refrigerator. Insert a wooden toothpick into a ball, and dip into melted chocolate. Return to wax paper, chocolate side down, and remove toothpick. Repeat with remaining balls. Refrigerate for 30 minutes to set.

A few tips:

When making the balls, it is so much easier using a small cookie scoop. This way all the buckeyes are the same size and it takes a fraction of the time. Trust me; it is worth the $5 to invest in one.
When making these balls for holiday plates and parties that are a bit fancier, I put the dipped balls into holiday mini cupcake liners. It makes serving them much tidier, festive, and everyone’s fingers don’t get into all of the balls. (Normally though, no liners)
Depending on your climate/humidity you may need to use less or more sugar. If you find that your dough is dry as you begin to roll your peanut butter balls, next time use less sugar. To save your batch add some milk 1 tsp at a time to moisten your dough. You may also find that working the dough (i.e. warming it with your hands) will also do the trick.
Another fun and FAST way to get the same tasty result, is to double the recipe, press the peanut butter part in a 9 x 9 glass pan, pour the melted chocolate over top, refrigerate, and then cut into small squares when thoroughly chilled. It saves the time of forming each ball and dipping them.
If you're feeling adventurous, try adding some of the following to your peanut butter mixture: rice krispies, coconut, finely chopped nuts. Or, use part creamy peanut butter and part chunky!

I can’t believe it! Christmas is almost here – seriously! No, the tree isn’t up. Honestly, I don’t see it going up this year, there is just WAY too much going on in the Ales household. Of course, this is on top of the already crazy busy schedule I’ve been holding up. Yikes – can’t wait for it to all be over!

We’re almost done with our Christmas shopping, and the Christmas menu’s are ready to shop for. Mom and Dad (and Scotty too!) will arrive sometime Friday and will spend the holiday with us (SO looking forward to it!). It’ll be great to have someone to prepare our meals with – and even improve the recipes with!

The house is just about as festive as it is going to get this year. I am going to drag a few more things out of the attic though. I need some bling-y ornaments out – it simply won’t be Christmas without them.

This year, we’re taking some of our friends and neighbors treat bags. Rather than going with cookies and candies, we’re doing a sweet and salty combination. I’m hoping to make big batches of my chex mix (it’s the basic recipe with a few extra ingredients) and batches of my caramel chocolate popcorn (think Harry & David’s Moose Mix! I’m addicted!). We’ll put together packages with bags of each – so everyone will have both!

Be sure to stop by the Maya Road Design Team blog tomorrow! We each created projects to share! There is all kinds of creative festive fun going on!

Christmas 2006: Getting into the Spirit

I’m trying REALLY hard to get myself into the Christmas spirit. This year, it’s harder than I expected it to be. Working so many hours, hasn’t allowed me to do the things I normally do that make it “feel” like Christmas. In years past, some of the things I’ve done to get into the Christmas spirit include:

Choosing a boy from an “angel tree” who is the same age as Dylan. It’s a fun way to do something positive in his memory, and in turn keeping me in touch with things little boys his age do.
Singing away and to my hearts content with the church choir and joyfully join in the congregational singing of Christmas music and of course this naturally includes singing in the car, in line at the store, and at work! I’m admitting it, but I haven’t yet joined a choir in Texas. There… it’s out there. All of my Utah college friends are probably in shock, and my Ohio friends probably are too. (I’m a big time lover of singing!) Mom and Dad don’t be TOO shocked when you come out next week. I know, I LOVE to sing. But, honestly we haven’t made it to church in a few weeks (you already know that though). Both Steve and I’s work schedules have been REALLY crazy. I’ve been working 7 days straight for almost a month (wait… that’s almost 28 days straight… this girl needs a BREAK!) – Sunday’s included. A few of my favorite Christmas church songs are: Hark the Herald Angels Sing, A Single Star (Choir Arrangement), The First Noel, Silent Night (Stille Nacht auf Deutsche), and Sleep Holy Child (performance arrangement).
Baking up a festive storm and delivering treat plates to friends and family. I love to bake (my mother instilled this in me at a very young age). Of course, it’s always great to share the calories with others (and thus eliminating some of the temptation to us!) Some of my favorite holiday yummies include Christmas Cherry Bread (It’s a Beste thing), Russian Teacakes, German Spice Cookies (with almonds!), Ohio Buckeyes, Butter Spritz Cookies and Corn Flake wreaths! Unfortunately, there hasn't been any time to bake yet! Boo!
Decking the Halls (aka our house) with all kinds of festive jolly. I LOVE putting up my Christmas tree. It’s taken me a while to find the perfect decorations for it (and of course, every year I find a few more to add to it). I love how it ends up... totally packed with ornaments all in red, gold, clear, cream, or “natural” (like grapevine stars, german straw stars, pinecones, etc). The only decorating I've done this year (so far) is to hang a few "spare" stockings on the fireplace mantel for our guests, and wreaths on the front door (front and back). Depressing, eh? Hopefully this weekend we'll get to decking our halls!
Jamming to Holiday tunes. This year, I added a few new discs to my collection. I LOVE bluegrass music (Allison Krauss and Nickel Creek are a few favorites- it’s too bad that neither have Christmas discs!) and have really been hoping to find a few discs in that genre. Bah – haven’t found any yet. I do have plenty of Country Christmas music though. Two other cd’s that I added to our collection this year are Wintersong by Sarah McLachlan (awesome, incredible and beautiful album!) and Sounds of the Season by John Legend (Dad, you’ll love this one, it’s very jazzy and bluesy!). Of course, I can’t help but pop in my old time music (ha ha ha) like the nSync Christmas CD, Jessica Simpson’s CD, or one of Mariah Carey’s holiday CD’s. And of course, it just isn’t Christmas without Neil Diamond singing to me (curses to my mother – I HATED it growing up, but now it’s just not the same).
Shopping on Black Friday. Although in years past this has been a lot of fun (in Ohio with my girl friends), I haven’t done it in at least 3 years. As fun as it was, I can’t say that I’m terribly heartbroken that I haven’t participated. I’m more heartbroken that I still have plenty of shopping still to do!
Secret Santa Exchanges. I’m participating in 3 different exchanges. Yes, 3!! I’m playing with my co-Pink Ladies over at ScrapTalk.com, and with the other designers on the Maya Road Design Team. I’m also playing at work – yikes… no wonder I don’t have all of my shopping done, I’m too busy being a Secret Santa!
Making my Christmas Cards. THis year, I actually have a plan - and it's in motion. Those of you who know me well, know that I am HORRIBLE at starting projects and not getting them finished. I'm just that way! But, the cards are going to go out this year - even if I don't get a minutes sleep! Many of my friends and family expect something handmade, especially since I do so much design work. Honestly, the pressure of creating something that will do (and sometimes it'll just HAVE to do) is overwhelming and nothing gets done.

Hopefully, as the rest of the week rolls on, I'll get a few more things accomplished. Hopefully I'll be a bit more in the holiday, festive mood. Hopefully, I'll not be at work so much this weekend and can actually get a few things accomplished!

Something Festive

I've been trying to spend a bit of time creating. It's the easiest and cheapest therapy or relaxation technique I can think of (well, when I don't "need" something to "finish" my "project"

that is... tee hee hee). I love that I can do it whenever I have a spare minute - and quite honestly spare minutes are in VERY short supply lately.

I picked up a "'tis the season" kit from Becky Novacek at Silver Bella last month. I had not found the time to sit down and create but have wanted to create it for my holiday decor. I managed to carve out a bit of time here and there over the last few days, and this is the result. I utilized products I had handy, and put my own spin onto Becky's design. I love how it turned out!

The products I used on my project include: Scenic Route Patterned Paper, Magnetic Poetry ('tis the") stamps, Maya Road Sheer Alphabet Letters, Ranger Dabber Acrylic Paint, Vintage Gold Glass Glitter, Magic Scraps buttons, Making Memories rub ons, Scenic Route Chipboard letters, Plaid crackle & acrylic paints, and finally, scrabble board and letters. (i know I know... the inhumanity of ruining a scrabble game - but i'm sure Becky bought them soley for this purchase and did not thieve them from an actual game.)

Catching Up: a Meme

Some time ago, Sophia had this as a blogging challenge. I started it, but didn't post it. So, it's overdue, but now it's posted. :)

one. I am a... daughter, wife, aunt, niece, coworker, designer, mother, friend, chef, artist, karaoke queen, and so much more!
two. My mother knows me best!
three. I feel... tired, exhausted, and overwhelmed.
four. the most important thing in my life is... my huge, crazy, wild, dramatic families (they aren’t things though)
five. I always carry... my Burts Bees Lip Balm
six. I think people are... generally nice.
seven. I’m at my happiest when I’m... with my family or creating.
eight. on a Monday morning, you can find me at... work.
nine. my favorite food ingredient is ... umm all of them?
ten. my eyes are... unusual.
eleven. my favorite material possession is... my wedding ring.
twelve. to relax, I like to... get a massage.
thirteen. the town I live in is... small!
fourteen. my worst habit is... shopping.
fifteen. my guilty pleasure is... shopping.
sixteen. when I look at someone, the first thing I see is... their smile.
seventeen. I think... self agency is awesome!
eighteen. I can live... without guilt.
nineteen. I wish... I had my family living closer to me.
twenty. my life is ... perfect just for me.

Christmas Ornament Inspiration

If you're in need of some holiday inspiration, stop by the Maya Road Design Team Blog today to check out some ornaments that we've been working on! All of the gals seriously rocked the theme - I have been SO inspired! Hopefully, I'll have some time this weekend to do some creating of my own!

ISO: Booty Shakin', Get your Butt in Gear Music

Alright, so it’s no surprise, I’m swamped at work. Swamped probably isn’t even a good description, drowning is definitely closer to where I’m at. I’ve been jamming to various tunes on my iPod, (Steve’s upgrading me for Christmas! What a stud!). It’s been incredibly important because I have a lot of chatterbox’s around me and if I don’t have music to tune them out, I’m inclined to chat along with them. With the level of work I need to accomplish, I just don’t have the time to chat.

I need a new round of tunes to keep me going. I’ve been listening to quite a variety of tunes, and I think their cycle has been filled for now. Here’s what I’ve had in my play cycle: (Don’t laugh. Actually you can if you want – I would if I were you)

Britney Spears - Greatest Hits
Christina Aguilera – Stripped
Mariah Carey – Charm Bracelet
Mariah Carey – Greatest Hits
Jessica Simpson – A Public Affair
Nick Lachey
Jessie McCartney
Dixie Chicks – Taking the Long Way
Nickelcreek – All of their CD’s
Nora Jones
Rascal Flatts – Everything!
Toby Keith – Any mean, butt kicking song!
Eminem

Most of them are songs you’d find at a club, and have a great busy beat, so they’re easy to work along to and work FAST to.

What are your favorite jamming tunes? I’m taking about tunes that get you off of your butt, and start moving songs?

Welcome: Fourth Quarter 2006

Ever have one of those days… that turns into one of those weeks… that could quite possibly turn into one of those months?

That’s where I’m at.

Welcome to the fourth quarter of 2006, Ladies and Gentlemen!

Everyone at work has told me over and over… “Just wait until fourth quarter; you’ll be so busy you won’t know what to do!” (They should have just said wait until the end of November and all of December get here.. you'll wish you had another job!)

They were right. Don’t get me wrong, the overtime will be fantastic. Steve will be thrilled with the extra money. However, I’m going to be so tired – I wont be able to spend it (Steve will remain thrilled). It’s a blessing to have a job, and have the benefits – but my golly, my mental stamina might be completely gone by 12/31!

I worked 52 hours last week, and that’s with leaving work at 2pm on Wednesday and not working at all on Thursday.

This week is going to be even worse. I predict close to 68 hours, but I could be wrong.

Please, God, please let me be wrong!

The point of my rambling, whining post is that I might be MIA over the next few weeks. Don’t worry, if all fails, I’ll definitely be back in time to report about my incredible massage and a spa visit in January (I'm going to get that appointment scheduled ASAP, and am treating myself – go me! I deserve it!).

Do you ever....

Do you ever have one of those days where you realize that some things in your life just plain suck – and there’s not a dang thing you can do about it?

Today is one of those days. No, my life in general does not suck. Circumstances and attitudes/people beyond my control do. It’s hard. It’s especially hard when surrounded by these people, and when trying to do nice things for them that go completely unappreciated, unnoticed, or are just expected.

Maybe I’m just being overly PMSy hormonal and blowing things out of proportion (which could entirely be accurate).

One thing I know for sure, and it's become even more clearer over the last few days, I love, appreciate, and am incredibly thankful for my family – and for my parents and how they chose to raise my siblings and I. During days like today, the contrasts become obvious – and my heart is full of thanksgiving for them, and for their endless love and support.

I’ve learned a few things over the last few days and have made some decisions:

I will teach my children the value of working and earning.
I will teach my children the value in showing appreciation and giving thanks.
I will teach my children the importance and power of family relationships.
I will teach my children the importance of supporting others through their challenges, struggles, trials, and grief.
I will teach my children the importance of being independent, and self sufficient.
I will teach my children how to communicate.
I will teach my children the importance of being modest (in clothing and actions).
I will teach my children the importance of cleanliness (in all things).
I will teach my children to respect others and their beliefs – even if (and especially if) they are different from ours.
I will teach my children that they determine their destination and path in life.
I will teach my children that their attitude is up to them.
I will teach my children that they have the choice to react or not to various influences.
I will love my children – and they will know they are loved, without end.

I have much to be thankful for in my life – and I am thankful. I realize that life is not perfect, and that everything can’t be ideal. Realizing these things makes me recognize the blessings and wonderful people I (usually) have around me – and who continually support and love me. I have an incredible husband, who loves me despite my faults. I have an incredible family (two of them!) who love me without end. I have a home, a job, and many other comforts that others do not. I have a Heavenly Father who gives me comfort, knows my needs, and is there for me when ever I need or call upon Him.

I am so blessed.

Thanksgiving 2006: Grandma's Green Bean Casserole

This is a tried and true family recipe. Once you make this dish, you’ll never want to go back to the traditional canned version again!

INGREDIENTS:

2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon white sugar
1/4 cup onion, diced
3/4 cup sour cream
3 (14.5 ounce) cans French style green beans, drained
2 cups shredded Mild Cheddar cheese
1/2 cup crumbled buttery round crackers
1 tablespoon butter, melted

INSTRUCTIONS:

Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Melt 2 tablespoons butter in a large skillet over medium heat. Stir in flour until smooth, and cook for one minute. Stir in the salt, sugar, onion, and sour cream. Add green beans, and stir to coat. Transfer the mixture to a 2 1/2 quart casserole dish. Spread shredded cheese over the top. In a small bowl, toss together cracker crumbs and remaining butter, and sprinkle over the cheese.

Bake for 30 minutes in the preheated oven or until the top is golden and cheese is bubbly.

Thanksgiving 2006: Easy Banana Cream Pie

This pie is great for any time of year - and it's fast to make! When I make it, I normally use a vanilla wafer crust rather than a graham cracker crust. I like to add a few mashed bananas to the cream filling and real whipped cream instead of cool whip. This is a great recipe if you are in need of a quick dessert.

Ingredients:

1 graham cracker pie crust
1 (3 1/2 ounce) box instant vanilla pudding
1 (3 1/2 ounce) box instant banana pudding
2 cups milk
8 ounces cream cheese, softened (at room temperature)
1 (8 ounce) carton nondairy whipped topping (Cool Whip)
3 ripe bananas
1/2 cup shredded coconut

Instructions:

Mix vanilla and banana pudding together with milk. Add cream cheese and mix with hand mixer until thickened. Place in graham cracker crust and top with whipped topping, sliced bananas and coconut. Chill for at least 1 hour before serving.

Alternative:

Take one or two of the bananas and mash them up and add them to the filling along with the cream cheese. Then slice the remaining banana(s) for the topping.

Thanksgiving 2006: Banana Cream Pie

This isn't my recipe - it's Emerils! I've heard that pieces of this pie are more requested at his restaurants more than any other. Steve's a HUGE banana cream pudding nut, so this was a definite addition to our menu. I know it looks like a lot of work - but it's worth it! I don't do the caramel or chocolate sauce - It really isn't needed. The one time I did use the sauces though, I bought them from the grocery store!

Ingredients:

5 large egg yolks
1/4 cup cornstarch
3 to 3 1/2 cups heavy cream
1 1/2 cups sugar
1 vanilla bean, split and scraped
3 cups graham cracker crumbs
1/2 ripe banana, mashed
1/4 pound (1 stick) unsalted butter, melted
3 pounds of bananas, cut crosswise into 1/2-inch slices
3/4 cup caramel sauce
1 cup chocolate sauce
2 cups heavy cream whipped to stiff peaks with 1/2 teaspoon pure vanilla extract and 2 teaspoons granulated sugar
shaved chocolate
powdered sugar

Caramel Drizzle Sauce Ingredients:

1 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup water
1 cup heavy cream

Chocolate Sauce Ingredients:

1/4 cup half-and-half
1 tablespoon unsalted butter
1/2 pound semisweet chocolate chips
1/4 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

Instructions for the Pie:
In a mixing bowl, combine the egg yolks, cornstarch and 1 cup of the heavy cream. Whisk to blend well. Set aside. Combine the remaining 2 cups cream, 1 1/2 cups of the sugar, and the vanilla bean in a large heavy-bottom saucepan over medium heat, Whisk to dissolve the sugar and bring to a gentle boil, about 10 minutes.

Slowly add the egg yolk mixture, whisking constantly until it thickens, about 5 minutes. Be forewarned: the mixture will break. Don't be alarmed! Pour it into a glass bowl. Press a piece of plastic wrap down over the surface of the mixture to prevent a skin from forming. Let cool completely at room temperature.

When cooled, remove the vanilla bean and pour the mixture into the bowl of an electric mixer fitted with a wire whip. Beat at medium-speed to combine the mixture. If it will not combine, warm another 1/2 cup heavy cream and slowly add it to the mixture. Whip until you have a thick and creamy custard.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. In a mixing bowl, combine the graham cracker crumbs, the remaining sugar and the mashed banana. Mix thoroughly. Add the butter and mix well. Press the mixture into a 9-inch pie pan. Bake until browned, about 25 minutes. Remove the pan from the oven and cool, for about 10 minutes.

Directions for the Caramel Sauce
In a small, heavy-bottomed saucepan, combine the sugar and water and bring the mixture to a boil, stirring often. Cook, stirring occasionally, until the mixture is a deep caramel color and has the consistency of a thin syrup, 10 to 15 minutes. Remove from the heat. Stir in the cream, return the saucepan to the high heat and boil the sauce until it regains the consistency of a thick syrup, about 2 minutes. Cool.

The sauce can be refrigerated until ready to use. Allow it to reach room temperature before drizzling it over the pie.

Directions for the Chocolate Sauce:
Combine the half-and-half and butter in a small heavy-bottomed saucepan over medium heat. Heat the mixture until a thin paper like skin appears on the top. Do not boil. Add the chocolate and vanilla and stir until the chocolate melts and the mixture is smooth. Remove from the heat and let cool.

The sauce can be kept refrigerated for several days, but it must be returned to room temperature before serving.

Assembling Directions:
To assemble, spread about 1/2 cup of the custard on the bottom of the crust. Arrange about a third of the banana slices, crowding them close together over the custard. Next, spread 1 cup of the custard over the bananas. Arrange another third of the banana slices close together over the custard. Top with 1 cup custard and the remaining banana slices. Top with the remaining custard, covering the bananas completely to prevent them from turning brown.

Cover with plastic wrap and chill for at least 4 hours.

To serve, cut pie into wedges and drizzle on the caramel sauce and chocolate sauce. Top with the whipped cream and shaved chocolate. Sprinkle with confectioners sugar.

Yields: One 9-inch pie, 8 to 10 servings

Thanksgiving 2006: Double Chocolate Pie

This is a rich and creamy chocolate pie. There are chocolate chips, squares of unsweetened chocolate, and lots of eggs and milk. The filling is cooked up until thick and lovely and poured into a baked pie shell. One of the best parts - Besides the taste of course, is that It can be made two days in advance.

Ingredients:

1 (9 inch) pie crust, baked
1 1/2 cups white sugar
1/3 cup cornstarch
1/2 teaspoon salt
3 cups WHOLE milk
3/4 cup semisweet chocolate chips
2 (1 ounce) squares unsweetened chocolate, chopped
4 egg yolks, beaten
1 tablespoon vanilla extract

Instructions:

Combine sugar, cornstarch, and salt in a 2-quart saucepan. Stir in milk gradually. Add chocolate chips and unsweetened chocolate. Place over medium heat, stirring constantly, until mixture thickens and boils. Boil and stir 1 minute.

Place egg yolks in a medium heatproof bowl. Gradually pour half of chocolate mixture into egg yolks, whisking constantly.

Whisk egg yolk mixture back into mixture in saucepan. Place over medium heat and bring back to a boil, stirring constantly. Boil and stir 1 minute. Remove from heat; stir in vanilla extract.

Pour mixture into baked pie shell. Press a layer of plastic wrap onto filling. Refrigerate at least 4 hours but no longer than 48 hours. Remove plastic wrap before serving and top with whipped topping

Thanksgiving 2006: No Roll Pie Crust

This pie crust is so easy – and clean up is a BREEZE! This crust works best for savory pies like quiche, and pot pies. But, its also awesome for fruit and cream pies. The best part? No rolling necessary for this pie crust! Just mix it in the pan and press into the bottom and sides.

Ingredients:

1 1/2 cups all-purpose flour
1 teaspoon white sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup canola oil
2 tablespoons milk

Instructions:

In a 9 inch pie plate, sift flour, sugar and salt. make a well in the center and pour in oil and milk. Mix with a fork, then press into the bottom and sides of pie plate.

To bake: Preheat oven to 450 degrees F (230 degrees C.) Bake for 8 to 10 minutes, or until golden brown.

Notes:
If you’re using the crust for a quiche, use a bit less sugar and a tad more salt.

Thanksgiving 2006: a MEME

From Sophia's Two Peas Blogging Challenge:

Thanksgiving Twenty

Do you cook all or part of the meal? Normally all, that is unless someone asks if they cam bring something with them.
How much do you spend buying groceries for the meal? $150-$200?
Do you eat at home or go to someone else’s? We don't have any family here, so it's always at our house.
Describe your perfect bite? A little bit of mashed potatoes and stuffing together!
White meat or dark? White!
Stuffing with giblets or without? Without... but I cook the giblets and use the broth!
Anything you won’t eat at the Thanksgiving meal? ummm the plates? :)
Carve Mr. Gobble at the table or serve on a platter? Carve at the table! (if it doesn't fall apart when it comes out of the roaster or oven first!)
Favorite pie? Pecan or Pumpkin
Formal table or Chinet? This year it's Chinet all the way! Too many people!
Your menu? See this previous post
Favorite leftover? Frog Eye Salad
Extended family, friends, both or just the immediate family for dinner? All of the above
After dinner, do you go to the latest movie or football on TV? Neither - I always fall asleep!
Do you watch the Macy’s Parade? I don't usually have time. :(
Christmas decorations up before or after? After... RIGHT after!
Black Friday shopping or sleep in? Neither. :( I am working on Friday.
Any special Thanksgiving tradition? Everyone gets their own pie.
Favorite thing about Thanksgiving? Spending time with friends and family!
Favorite Thanksgiving memory? Golly so many of them are filled with great memories. But, the most unusual one was when we had a mexican thanksgiving and ate all kinds of incredibly yummy mexican foods. (I think it was when we lived in Geilenkirchen. Mom?)

Thanksgiving 2006: Crockpot Stuffing

As any Thanksgiving cook knows, oven space is especially tight on Thanksgiving (unless you have two ovens – I haven’t had that luxury!). I don’t cook my stuffing in the turkey (the timing always throws me off), and have always done it in the oven. Finding this recipe was a God send. It’s easy, keeps my oven free, and is very tasty. It’s one of those recipes that you need to adjust for your altitude and climate (warmer/drier climates would use more broth, cold/wet climates would use less). If you have a newer crock-pot (I find they cook a bit faster), periodically check on your stuffing to make sure it’s not cooking faster then you want.

Ingredients:

1 cup butter or margarine

2 cups chopped onion

2 cups chopped celery

1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley

12 ounces sliced mushrooms

12 cups dry bread cubes

1 teaspoon poultry seasoning

1 1/2 teaspoons dried sage

1 teaspoon dried thyme

1/2 teaspoon dried marjoram

1 1/2 teaspoons salt

1/2 teaspoon ground black pepper

4 1/2 cups chicken broth, or as needed (2-3 14 oz cans)

2 eggs, beaten

Instructions:

Melt butter or margarine in a skillet over medium heat. Cook onion, celery, mushroom, and parsley in butter, stirring frequently.

Spoon cooked vegetables over bread cubes in a very large mixing bowl. Season with poultry seasoning, sage, thyme, marjoram, and salt and pepper. Pour in enough broth to moisten, and mix in eggs. Transfer mixture to slow cooker, and cover.

Cook on High for 45 minutes, then reduce heat to Low, and cook for 4 to 8 hours. (If necessary, remove the lid for the last hour to eliminate some of the moisture)

Yields 16 servings

Notes:

~ If you use store bought dry bread crumbs, use less water. (Less for fresh bread and more for store bought hard packaged)

~ Try adding sausage (go for the sage sausage and leave the sage out of the listed ingredients).

~ Alternative additions: 1/4 c. dried cranberries, 1/4 c. diced (cooked) pork tenderloin, 1/4 c. raw cashews, 1/4 c. roasted almonds and 1 t. each Emeril's Essence, Montreal chicken seasoning, celery salt, marjoram and onion powder

Thanksgiving 2006: Recipes!

I've had a few recipe requests for some of the items we'll be having this year for Thanksgiving. I'm trying to get them added into my Recipe Blog (From My Kitchen to Yours). So far, it's just my Cranberry Sauce recipe. I'll try to add in the rest of them later today, and this evening. There are a few of our favorite recipes there already - tonight we're having the Jambalaya! Yum!

What are a few of your favorite recipes?

Thanksgiving 2006: Cranberry Sauce

Seriously, this is SO easy - and very tasty. You'll never go back to canned cranberry sauce again!

Ingredients:
12 ounces Cranberries
1 c. white sugar
1 c. orange juice
Optional: 1 t. grated orange rind (the orange part)

Instructions:
Place cranberries in a bowl of clean water. Pick through, discarding stems and rotten berries. Drain berries.
In a medium sized saucepan over medium heat, dissolve the sugar in the orange juice. Stir in the cranberries and cook until the cranberries start to pop (about 10 minutes). Remove from heat and place sauce in a bowl. Cranberry sauce will thicken as it cools.

Yields about 2 cups.

Check it out... Announcing the Maya Road Design Team Blog!

I bet you didn't know that the Maya Road Design Team has a blog - did you? If you didn't know, don't fret - it's new. It's only been on the net for a week or so, and is in the process of being developed. It'll be a place loaded with eye candy and other fun Maya Road product samples. Add it to your daily "must see" list. You never know when a RAK or posting contest will happen, and who doesn't need more Maya Road? :)

Budget Alert: Garage Sale Paradise

This Sauturday, Nov 18th at Magic Scraps {click for map} from 9 AM - 3 PM will be another mother of all Garage sales!!! Magic Scraps overstock liquidation, Scrapbook University final liquidation & individual tables from local scrappers (like ME!)! Come find amazing deals to create Christmas presents in bulk - or find something you've never used, but want to try...While you're there pick up a schedule of digital & hybrid scrapbooking classes for Polka Dot Potato and see the amazing print services they offer! The machine Ashley has in here is incredible & she can print anything & everything from photos to 12x12 layouts or your holiday cards!

Tonight is the Night... Emmitt or Mario?

I {love} to dance! I think it's part of the whole showtunes, Broadway, and choir part of me. I love to get my groove on. I don't go out dancing anymore, well not in a very long time (other than while visiting friends in Ohio), but I do dance around the house. Normally, it's late at night, when I'm all alone (Steve's at work) and I've got the cleaning bug. I'll crank up the stereo with some jammin' tunes, and rock out like I'm a teenager.

I'm not a graceful dancer. In fact, I'm somewhat of a clumsy dancer - but I enjoy it just the same. My mother tells me that I have rythmn - which may be correct. But, dancing (at least organized dancing) hasn't ever been easy for me. It's still fun though!

Growing up in Germany, I remember many a dance where everyone did the fox trot (or other ballroom dance) to everything. Yes, everything. There wasn't much of the style of dance we see now. No line dancing. No booty shaking. No girls with their arms around the boys necks, and the boys arms around the girls waist. It was ballroom all the way. Imagine watching a bunch of otherwise modern teenagers and young adults dancing the fox trot to rap. Funny, eh?

You don't see it anymore, and back then I didn't think it was so strange, just a little bit unusual. Now I think it's downright hilarious - it cracks me up when I think about it.

What brings me to this thinking? Ahhhh Dancing with the Stars. I love to watch this ABC show. It's been fun to see each of the couples start out with stumbling and heavy steps to now where they dance with grace and finesse. Each week another couple has been eliminated - I admit to feeling some sorrow as they have left. (Getting to spend so much time dancing - and with a professional partner to boot - must have been a BLAST!!)

Tonight is the grand finale. We'll find out who the champion is! Could it be Mario Lopez or will it be Emmitt Smith? Personally, I find them both to be awesome dancers. They both have rythmn and they both have style. They're both incredibly fit - and quite nice to look at. I admit that Emmitt is my favorite - and not because he's a former Cowboy. It's because of his smile, and because of the personality he displays while dancing. He's awesome.

Go Emmit!

Thanksgiving Plans...

I can’t believe that Thanksgiving is just around the corner. WOW…. There’s so much to do, and work is going gung ho; so having extra time to be festive and decorative is at a minimum. (riiiight… I’ll probably get a wild hair going on sometime next week and feel the urge to do some major decorating and crafting before Thanksgiving!)

This year, we’re going to have a full house- isn’t that how holidays are supposed to be? One set of Steve’s parents (Russ & Jill) will be flying in this coming Sunday and will be with us for a week. Thomas will be here, as will Kimberlee and James – I’m pretty sure they’re both bringing a few friends along too. We’ve invited a few other couples to join us – seating will definitely be at a premium! We’re not a formal family – so it’ll probably be “squat where you find a spot.”

Despite the tight schedule, I’m really looking forward to Thanksgiving. Our menu is going to be fairly simple this year, but food will be plentiful! So far, our menu will include:

Turkey
Mashed Potatoes (using Grandma Cash’s yummy make ahead recipe – WAHOO!)
Homemade Gravy (using the turkey drippings)
Homemade Stuffing (I’m even making the bread for it this year – are you impressed Mom??)
Homemade Cranberry Sauce (LOVE it – and it’s so EASY it is to make!)
Homemade Rolls (can’t get by without them! It’s a Beste thing!)
Green Bean Casserole
Yams/Sweet Potatoes
Corn
Frog Eye Salad (It’s a Beste thing…. And it’s so tasty! You might have had it as Pearl Drop Salad)

Of course, that’s all in addition to the plethora of desserts we’ll have. We have a tradition at our house that calls for each person getting their own Thanksgiving pie – whatever pie they want. So, there will be LOTS of pie making going on at my house next week! I think I’m going to invest in the smaller pie tins (I think they’re 5” round) instead of making everyone 8” or 9” pies.

With all this food talk, I really want to get going on Christmas stuff already! My Christmas planner is almost done (thanks to Carolyn Peeler’s class kit from Silver Bella) and sugar plums are dancing around in my head. I want to put the Christmas Tree up now – especially since I have my German wooden ornaments out. Steve just laughs at me. J I love a Christmas house – someday I’ll have one, with a Christmas Tree in every room. I can’t wait! J

Welcome to the new members of the Maya Road 2007 Design Team

Today was the big day - the awaited announcement of the new additions to the 2007 Maya Road Design Team. I am in awe at the talent that applied to be part of our team - the various galleries have been over flowing with incredible projects with really creative ideas. I know the decision was hard for the Maya Road Team of Caroline, Deb, and Jessica - how they managed to narrow it down to the final 6 is beyond me. I know I couldn't have done it! (ETA: it looks like they couldn't narrow it down to 6 either! There are 8 new members of our team!)

Without any further adu, the additions to the 2007 Maya Road Design Team (with links to their 2Peas Galleries) are:

A huge congratulations to the new team members. I'm really looking forward to working with each of them next year!

To those who entered, but were not selected:
Please know that this decision does not guage your skill as an artist; nor does it make your work any less worth while. I would hope that the project(s) you created and submitted are something you personally love, enjoy, and treasure. Though in the end you may not have had the result you sought, but you do have something of value - if only of your time and of yourself. You are still valued, and so is your work!

Paisley....

I love the paisley pattern. I REALLY love the paisley pattern. Recently, when reorganizing my patterned paper (from being all sorted by manufacturer to being mostly sorted by pattern) it became even more obvious. I have at least 2” of paisley patterned paper. WOW… I didn’t realize I was such an addict.

There’s a darling little girl at church whose name is Paisley. Ooooh, if only I can convince DH that we should name our future daughter Paisley. Hmmm Paisley Linette…. Paisley Lou… eww no. Paisley Anne? Hmmm there are plenty of options that we could use. Do you think she’d get teased with the Paisley Ales vs. Pale Ale similarity? I think way too much into these things. (Note: No, I’m not pregnant!)

Is it any wonder, that with this addiction that these dishes are calling my name? I really want to have the serving platter – how gorgeous would it be with my fall table settings? It would be fantastic for Thanksgiving, It would definitely look beautiful with scones piles onto it. The colors would go quite nicely with my kitchen decor and scheme. Don’t ‘cha think?

Holiday Happiness

I SO have the holiday bug.... I'm not referring to the ick I still have - I'm referring to the holiday urge to decorate and celebrate!

Years ago (when we lived in Berlin - before the wall fell, if I remember correctly) my mother purchased these little wooden people ornaments for our Christmas tree. I have always loved them, and have always looked forward to seeing them on my parents tree each year. Over the last few years, they haven't made their holiday appearance. As things often do as they age, they've started to fall apart and the time wasn't available to spend putting them back together.

Mom knew how much I loved them, and when she came to visit a few weeks ago, she brought me a delightful box full of little wooden people (and... tee hee hee a grundle of Dad's karaoke cd's to croon away with!). I knew that they'd need a little TLC, and this weekend their time arrived. A few of them have missing arms, a few need to have their paint touched up. The viking warrior's shield has chipping paint. Lady Liberty's flame is blowing upside down. The little devil needs his horns and ears glued back on - and the angels wings are askew. They've all seen much better years. But, I can't express to you how happy they make me.

They remind me of the happy Christmas's I've had with my family - of the incredible memories and fun times we've had. The hours we've sat around the piano singing together; how I enjoyed my fathers deep bass voice, my mothers beautiful harmonizing alto, my sister's sweet soprano, one brothers incredible tenor and the other's great bass - all partnered up with my soprano (or attempting alto). For me, music has always been an integral part of the Christmas season.

These ornaments remind me of the places we've lived, countries we've visited, people we've loved and served, happy memories that were created, and the REALLY tasty and yummy foods Mom made (ooooh talk about happy memories there).

As we get ready to celebrate the holiday season (I can't believe that Thanksgiving is RIGHT around the corner!), I'm going to make sure I take the time to journal all of the things I remember about holidays past - so that they're available for my holidays future. I want to make sure that the good times are around for a long time - just like these awesome wooden ornaments.

Color Me Productive!

I know this is going to sound vain.... but... dang it, I'm impressed with myself! :) Thomas (my bro in law) popped over at 630am this morning, and I was actuallly coherent enough to manage a full conversation with him - AND make scones for breakfast. Ahhhh this doesn't happen often, especially when I'm feeling icky (but feeling MUCH better!), so I have to honk my own horn when I can. :)

My family LOVES scones. Actually I fell in love with them when we were in California for Kim's high school graduation. I hadn't had them before, and was able to enjoy them a few different times. Talk about heaven. I must admit, my favorite was from this cool mendo coffee shop in Ukiah called the "Coffee Critic". They were orange and cranberry flavored with just a bit of chopped walnuts.

As soon as we got home from that trip, I was running full throttle to find the perfect scone recipe. While it might not be perfect - it is yummy. We've tried lots of different variations on the recipe and have tossed lots of different flavors into the mix. Today it was cranberry (using fresh cranberries versus dried) and orange (using the dried peel found in the spice section of the grocery store). They are tasty... the boys were thrilled. I'm happy that I could do something so simple to make them both happy - and fill all of our tummies at the same time.

Tom actualy stopped by to see if one of us would go to IKEA with him. Oh would I??? Please, that's one store no one EVER has to ask me if I'l go to.. it's always a huge yes. Duh... love that place.

After that, it's onto getting the front flower garden tidied and ready for the fall. Fun times I tell you, fun time.

Off to IKEA....

Make it a great day!

Bad Blogger.....

I know, really it's not much of a shock to you. I am a baaaad blogger! Over the last few weeks, I've had oodles of things going on and haven't taken the time to sit down and keep everyone appropriately updated.

So much has been going on - and so much is on the horizon! I think I'll be running full speed all the way to my birthday in January. {Note to self: schedule pampering massage for your birthday.}

It's been a VERY long week. I'm still struggling with the sicky thing. It's definitely not been pleasureful - but it's been survivable. Mucinex is really a GREAT thing (and the Walmart brand is less than half the price and does the job just dandily!). Fourth quarter has started at work, which means that my life basically revolves around tax deadlines. From what I understand, it's not unusual to work 20+ hours of overtime per week November - December. Ohhh what fun it's going to be.... :)

I'm still unpacking from Silver Bella. I have glitter EVERYWHERE. I don't know what it the TSA thought it was but every single little tiny bag (they're like 2"x3" bags - if that!) of glitter was opened. EVERY bag. Most of the bags were NOT reclosed, so as a result every stitch of everything that was packed in a suitcase is sparkly. Not that I'm complaining of course. I'm sure Steve will get worried when he finds glitter in his drawers though. :) (By the way, if you're a glitter addict like myself, be sure to check out an incredible store: Splinters and Rags. She has an awesome selection, incredible customer service, and high quality glass glitter. I've ordered from her and am VERY pleased!)

Yesterday the team at Maya Road announced the 13 finalists for the 2007 Design Team Search. It's been such a joy and a pleasure to see so many incredible projects that so many artists have entered. I haven't seen the actual entries (thankfully), but from what I've seen on various boards, I know the competition must have been incredibly stiff. I've been inspired many times over. It would be wonderful if Deb and Caroline could accept all of the artists who applied, but it's just not feasible. They have been kind and generous enough though to send each artist a little something in the mail for entering. How fantastic! I don't know about the other Design Team members, but I'm on pins and needles waiting for next week to get here just so I can find out who the 6 new members of our team will be!

Tonight I'm going over to the Lewisville Scrapbook Warehouse to visit with some of my scrapping friends. Amazingly enough, i'm actually packed and ready to go. I know - shocker! It was such a hard thing to accomplish - especially since I had everything packed for last weekend! :) I'm planning to complete one of the class kits I purchased last weekend from the instructors of the classes I didn't get to attend. It's one of Carolyn Peeler's classes. Both were absolutely adorable. I can't wait until all of the projects are done - my house isn't going to know what hit it!

Honey.... I'm Home!!

WOW... what a whirlwind of a weekend it was. Pure bliss, delight, pleasure, and more than my fair share of glitter. The weekend was fantastic, with the exception of a grundle of "minor" challenges (does my life EVER go smooothly??), I had a complete blast.

I arrived Thursday and met up with Jana at the airpo

rt. Talked with the airline folks, with great hopes that they'd be able to locate a VERY important missing box that had been checked in with luggage. It didn't make the trip - but was to be waiting for us at our hotel the following day. After a short delay, the shuttle to the hotel arrived. Rather than checking out the nightlife, we played it easy; ordered a pizza from Godfathers and watched Grey's Anatomy (surely you didn't think I'd miss that did you??)

Friday morning a little suprise was waiting for me from Mother Nature. Yes, that's right... she sent my dear Aunt two and a half weeks early. What a delightful treat to wake up to.

After we checked out of our hotel (we weren't able to stay at the Hilton the entire weekend), we mozied on over to the Silver Bella hotel, got ourselves checked in, and then we took a much needed (and now required) trip to Target. What a fun trip it was! It was a sparkling new Target, loaded with many things I simply HAD to have. :)

We spent the rest of the afternoon checking out the fun Old Market section of Omaha. What a delight it was. We found a wonderful old shoppe and bumped into the fabulous Bellas; Teresa, Kim, Becky, Carolyn and Pam (Kelly and Cori too!). It was nice to see them prior to the event, and most definitely in their element. The shoppe was packed from basement to ceiling of fun and wonderful antiques. I purchased a few items and I can't wait to put them to creative use.

We returned to the hotel and got ready for the beginning of our grand event. Maija, Jana's most AWESOME and fun roommate joined us and we had a GREAT time. She is a doll!

After checking in to Silver Bella, we entered a room full of glittery and girly bliss. Each table was adorned with the coolest sparkly snowflakes, and plates filled with gorgeous glass glitter. At each seat was a pink cake box filled with the supplies we would need to complete our project for the night - a bella garland. Mine isn't finished (I didn't want to put it together and then figure out how to transport it safely on the plane). The one here is Teresa's sample one (image is from her blog).

After our class, it was time for the Bella Boutique. Oh boy! Oh boy! I managed to spend an indecent amount of money (well compared to what I had planned to spend anyway). There were treats for every fancy, and sussies to fit every princess. There was SO much talent and skill in each piece that each artist had brought to sell. It's a shame I wasn't able to buy more - there were three booths that I wanted to shop at, but alas I was out of money. :(

One of the things I was most looking forward to at Silver Bella was getting to meet some of my online friends, and to enjoy their creativity. The fabulous Cari Kraft (can you believe it - love her last name - it fits her PERFECTLY!!) was #1 on my list of artists to meet. This woman ooozes creativity - and coolness. Her Bella Boutique table was loaded with items you could special order (and boy will I be!!)

After calling it a night, I rested for a few hours so that I'd be bright and perky for the next morning. Classes were set to start at the un-bella hour of 8am - but I managed! :)

My first class of the day was with the incredible Pam Garrison - "Two Turtle Doves". Now, this is a woman who I could watch for hours and NEVER be bored. She's amazing. This class was for a gorgeous holiday banner. Mine is in the process of being recreated - my birds died a slow death in my luggage (I thought I packaged them safely enough - with tissue paper even. But alas, the wings were amputated... how sad!) I'll share photos when I have it done.

My next class was with Miz Foof herself, Teresa McFayden - "Christmas Card Stashaway". This was a cool creative project - and honestly mine is almost 100% complete. I have a few things to do to it to make it mine, but it will be ready to share sometime this weekend.

After the second class, we broke for lunch to enjoy delightful box lunches.

My third class was again with Pam Garrison - "And the Stockings Were Hung". VERY VERY VERY fun and cool project. I loved seeing everyone's creativity in their stocking (or banner as Amanda created). I can't wait to finish up mine and share it with you! I have a feelign that I'll be making several of them for the holidays this year!

My fourth class was also... again... with Teresa - "Crown of the Town". However, I was definitely feeling under the weather at this point and chose to take a nap. I managed to make it back down to the classroom though and enjoy everyone's crowns. Cori made an especially awesome one! I picked up the kit, and will share mine with you all when it's done.

We broke for dinner at this point, and I enjoyed myself with Maija and Jana in the Lobby of our hotel. The wait was too long

Leaving on a Jet Plane...

Well ladies and gents, the time has come! It's finally here! Silver Bella 2006, ready or not here I come!

My bags are totally packed.
My carry-on is loaded with things to keep me entertained.
My body is exhausted from last minute preparations - and the oodles of crazy hours I had to do at work to clear up some time.
My attire has been selected.
My toes are appropriately painted (well as appropriately as Tina - my nail tech - can do when you try to explain what a Siver Bella is... tee hee hee) and my fingernails tidy.
My class supplies are collected, organized and packed.
All of my ATC's are ready to be shared (once a few of them finish being assembled on the plane)!
Gifts for the fabulous instructors (with Texan style to boot!) are packed.
An extra book of checks are ready to be written.
Caffeine pills - check.
Sassiness - check!
Ready to have some fun and get glitterfied - check check check.

Have a great weekend, ya'll!

Ready or Not.....

I can't believe it's almost here! Silver Bella that is! I'm flying out tommorrow afternoon and will meet up with my pal, Jana, in good old COLD Omaha, Nebraska! I've got my "Naughty or Nice" ATC's ready to share, and the ATC's for the other group are ready to go too... well almost! I'll probably finish them up on the plane or in our hotel room on Thursday night. Is it too vain to put a photo of yourself on your ATC's?

My room is reserved and Beth is set to be my roommate for Friday - Saturday nights.

My supplies are laid out and ready to be packed up. I need to pull an extra suitcase out of the attic... just in case. :) Camera is charged and the memory cards are clear. My Nick & Nora flannel pj's are in the middle of being laundered and my bunny slippers are ready to be worn.

I'm really looking forward to the event. I know that Teresa has put an extraordinary amount of time into planning it, and the other instructors have put a grundle of time into it too! I can't wait to take the classes I was able to register for! I'm planning to purchase the kits for the ones I wasn't able to register for - so I'll be totally bella'd out! Is that even possible?

I always look forward to events such as this with much anticipation. There's something about attending a smaller event, there's a more intimate atmosphere. You're able to get to know the other participants and enjoy their creativity and personalities. There will be glitter and glitz a plenty - more than I'll know what to do with - I'm sure! I know that this weekend will be such fun!

Ready or not... here I come!

Family Time and Eternity

Wow! What a fantastic weekend! My family blessed us by coming to visit! Mom, Dad, and Scott all drove in from Farmington, New Mexico. We were able to get Bekki here on a flight and she brought baby Ainsley (who, in my most humble opinion, is MOST adorable!!). It was wonderful to spend time with them. It could only have been beat if my brother Robert had been able to join us.

Friday night, we gandered on over to the Saltgrass Steakhouse for my mom. She loves their ranch dressing, and I can't blame her. It is mighty tasty. We spent the rest of the evening enjoying being together as a family and just relaxing.

Saturday, we traveled into Dallas. Steve and I had a blessing to partake in - and boy did we ever. I'm so grateful that we were able to be sealed together for eternity. It was even more fantastic to have my family and a few of our friends there with us. The day was really special, and I wouldn't have had it any other way!

Creativity in the Kitchen....

Of course, I couldn't stop myself from signing up for another Creative Underground swap. The theme for this project was "Hot Flashes from the Kitchen". The premise is that each artist will create one master apron using specified dimensions (4.5"x11") with a rectangle cut out of the top center. The front of the apron was to be decorated with whatever you chose. The back needed to have a recipe that could be created in a flash. Afterall, we're all artists and we'd rather be creating art than cooking in our kitchens (well, as you know - I love to do both!).

After the apron was finished 30 color copies had to be made, and then laminated (artists=messy cooks.... I can vouch for that one!). After they were laminated, then you punched holes in the top strips and had to send them off to the Creative Underground so that they could be matched up into albums and bound. Mine went postal last week - and I can't wait to see the final piece. Here's a little peek of them!

There are such creative women in this group - I am SO lucky that Cari tipped me off to them!

Happy First Wedding Anniversary to Us!

I can’t believe it! Our first wedding anniversary has come! Not that I thought we wouldn’t make it, but when you’re planning your wedding, you don’t normally look towards your first anniversary. I remember looking forward to our first anniversary with a lot of anticipation because we would be sealed together as a couple – in many ways.

We spent our first anniversary as all newlyweds should – in bed! Actually it was on our airbed in the living room being lazy, watching tv, napping, and munching on delightfully tasty treats. We followed tradition and ate the top layer of our wedding cake. Amazingly enough it was tasty!

It’s been a fun, exciting, trying, testing, rewarding and learning year. We’ve had so much happen, we’ve worked on getting adjusted to each others living habits, we’ve had family move in and move out; there has been so much we’ve experienced over the last 12 months. I can’t wait too see what the next ones hold!

Artistic Pursuits and Bottlecaps

I love doing arsty stuff. I always have - probably always will (God willing that is). I found a really fun and creative group via Cari, and was able to join in on creativity they all posess. Right away I signed up for their altered "Flavors of Fall" bottlecap swap. Each person was to create/alter 29 bottlecaps with whatever represents the "flavors" of fall to them. It was such a fun project.

Of course, with our wedding anniversary being so close, it was parked on my mind. So, my bottlecaps had a wedding theme of sorts. Plus, I realized that almost all of the girls in my family were married in the fall/winter months. So, it's a natural think for me to think towards.

The photo is actually of one of the layers of bottle caps in the box I shipped them in. Well - in the second box. I sent the first set to a completely wrong zipcode and had to crank out a second one super fast. I'm glad they arrived - I can't wait to see the finished project!

The thrill of getting a {great} deal...

It's no suprise to anyone who knows me, and certainly NO suprise to anyone who's been to my studio, that I'm a hoarder. Yes, it's true I hoard anything that could in any way be art or crafty related. I hear that it's genetic - Sheri's the same way.

I'm learning though, that there is an element of creative freedom when I clear out my hoards of items. It's given me a new task - be more creative with less. The suprising thing (to me anyway) is that I am more creative when I have less to work with. I've been giving this subject much thought over the last 6 months and even more over the last 60 days or so.

My dear and true friend, Heather, had decided to try her hand at an eBay venture, clearing out others "junk" and selling it on a consignment basis. And so it was that a division of "Gift Closet Creations" was created. So, she's been working dilligently to help me clear out my hoards - and I've been loving every minute of it. It's been so nice to have extra space in my room, and to be able to actually feel free to create rather than organize or tidy up the piles.

Heather has done remarkably well - and as a result I've passed the word of her services onto other scrapbookers (and non-scrapbooking friends) and they've taken advantage of it! It's been quite delightful to see her little business start to flourish and grow. I've, even more, enjoyed getting pay checks (well, let's be honest... it's more of a rebate. I don't expect to make the same money back as what I purchased some of the items for.) from time to time. If you're interested in having someone clear out your stash, check her out! And, of course, if you're interested in what she's selling for me, check it out here!

Granted, I still have piles of items - but they're much more manageable, and the only one I have is patterned paper and cardstock. I'm giving some thought to reorganizing my current method of storing them. So, what's the point of taking the time to put them away by manufacturer, if I'm going to be moving them around in the near future? :)

Ladies... get your Maya Road groove on!!

The incredible Maya Road gals (Caroline, Deb, and Jessica) would like to add 6 designers to our team! Check out Deb's Blog Deb's Blog for more information and for the link to all the details for the 2007 Maya Road Design Team Member Search! It's a quick turn around - but I have no doubt that incredible entries will be sent in.

Home Decor with Vinyl

Ladies and Gentleman... in just a few short days (3 days and 2.5 hours to be more exact) I will have been a married woman for one full year. A WHOLE YEAR... can you believe it? I can't.

Anyway, I've enjoyed moving in, decorating our home, and getting used to the overall crazyness that our married life has been so far. One of the things I found for our home was

this awesome vinyl. It's visible as you walk into our home and is above our entryway hall closet.

I had it custom designed and cut by a local company, Home Script (www.homescript.net). I love it! I have a few other pieces that I had done for other parts of our home - and I have a list going for future ideas.

Using vinyl in home decor is awesome. It can be applied to almost any surface, and is easily removed. Once it's been applied you can't remove it and stick it up again (it's not reusable) but it's inexpensive enough that I don't mind. I plan on putting holiday appropriate quotes and sayings on the mirrors in our home for various occasions. I'll share photos when I get them up.

So, if you're local (heck even if you aren't) and you're looking for something customized and creative for your home, check them out. I found their prices to be less than larger websites, and the attention to detail was impeccible. Plus you would be ordering from a locally owned and operated company - which is something I believe in whole heartedly.

Hair Woes

For as long as I can remember, i've always had VERY straight hair.

In fact, when I was 12 my parents gave e a trip a salon to have my hair permed. It was a very big deal. I had fairly long hair, and the stylist (and I still remember how strange he was) shared that he was going to need to cut some of my hair off because it was too long to perm. So, my hair was cut to about 4" below my shoulders.

When I left that day, my hair was curly. When I went to bed that night, my hair was straight. No, I didn't wash it, rinse it, spritz it, jump in rain puddles or anything else that would have gotten my hair wet. The curls just fell out...

So, the next day my mother took me back to the salon to talk to the stylist

(still a very strange dude) and he said that my hair was still too long and that if he cut more off, the curl would bounce back in.

So, more of my hair came off. The curls didn't come back.

The point of the story is.... my hair has NEVER held curls. There was no hairspray, mousse, gel, spray or any other product that could get them to stay

Until about 6 months ago.....

My hair is now a flaming frizz ball (at times) with defined curls. I don't get it... I'm not complaining (necessarily) but sheeesh... this is still a new thing for me! I didn't do anything to my hair (perm, etc).

I've heard that hormones can do it to you... even when I was pregnant I didn't have hair like this.

So friends, any curly hair tips?

Adoption Answer Day!

Okay, answer day has arrived. Warning... It’s very, VERY long, and all of your questions (and then some) areanswered. I apologize for how long it's taken me to answer all of the questions, and get them posted. I truly wanted to make sure I gave each question an honest thoughtful answer.

First, following is a simple piece I wrote a few years ago to share with potential adoptive couples and birth parents.

Hello!

My name is Heather, and I wanted to share with you how adoption has changed my life. On September 25, 2002, I gave birth to a beautiful baby boy. Two days later I helped create a family by placing my son for adoption with two loving parents who could give him the life I could not.

Going back a few months, to when I found out I was pregnant, I was absolutely thrilled. But, I didn't know what I was going to do. For as long as I could remember, I had always wanted to be a mother when "I grow up." It had been my life's ambition, but this wasn't how it was supposed to happen!

There were so many thoughts running through my mind. How was I going to take care of this new precious baby?

I'm adopted myself, and it was often something I thought about. I truly count my adoption as one of the greatest blessings in my life. As I thought about possibly making an adoption plan for my baby, I more fully recognized the blessings I had received because of my birthmothers sacrifice and the love she has for me.

After much soul searching and tears I knew what I needed to do. I knew what would be best for my son, and as hard as it was to accept, it wasn't that he be with me. How I prayed that it wasn't true! I wanted him to be with me! After all, this WAS my life's ambition! But, I knew he needed and deserved to have a family that would have both a loving mother, and a loving father, a family who would raise him to be an upright and righteous man, and a family who could give him a happy life full of laughter and love.

With tears and a heavy heart, I began making an adoption plan for him. Soon, it became time to start looking for a family. There were so many loving families who could provide for him. It was an extremely difficult decision; things were slowly becoming real. And then, as soon as I saw their smiling faces, and read their letter, I felt a quiet confirmation. This was to be his family. They were meant to be his parents.

A short while later, I met the individuals I had chosen to be his parents. After meeting them, I knew I was doing the very best thing for him. They are two loving people, who would not be able to experience the joy of having a child, if it was not for the opportunity to adopt my son. They would be able to provide everything I could not.

For a while, I tried not to get attached to the baby growing inside me - to no avail. I was completely and totally in love. I now realize the stereotype the surrounds birthmothers and try to educate others about the incredible struggle we go through. There is a bond between a mother and her child, and it is incredibly hard to fight the battle of loving this baby, and knowing you can't keep him or her.

Through this time, I grew closer to my family. I started a scrapbook for my son. It was very important to me that he have answers to the many questions I had growing up about my birthmother and birthfather and my beginning into this world.

I started to feel like time was moving so quickly. The few months flew by, and suddenly he was here. Tears flowed down my face as I stared at my son. His eyes looked into mine, and I knew that he knew. No words can adequately express my mingled emotions at that moment. I knew that his family was eagerly awaiting him, but their joy was my anguish. I felt cheated of the timing, but I held my son and loved him every minute.

On September 27, 2002, it was finally time for him to go home with his new family. I sat in the hospital chapel holding him, rocking him, and kissing him through my tears. My heart was so raw ~ I started to pray holes in the roof of that building. 'Father, if thou wilt take this pain from me, I can't bear this any longer. Please take this burden from me.' His peace came to me, it engulfed me, and I was surrounded by His love.

What an overwhelming, spiritual, emotional, painful, and uplifting experience. When his parents walked into the hospital chapel, I felt a burning in my chest, the spirit was so strong! His mother was crying harder than I was, and the happiness that glowed from her was amazing! Looking at her, I knew I was doing the right thing. I knew they were to be his parents, and it was all worth it. This meeting was short and sweet. I did not try to stop the tears as they ran down my face. With a strength and confidence I never knew I had, I told them I had something for them, and brought forth my son and placed him into his mother’s arms. He was theirs, and the looks on their faces further confirmed to me of their love - they loved both of us. And as I left the room, God held my hand.

Placing my son with his adoptive family was indeed the hardest trial I have yet gone through. But, I know I did the right thing, and that my son will have the life I could not yet provide for him.

I'm so grateful for my family. I'm grateful for the love they shower me with, despite the pain and anguish I created for them. In the beginning, I didn't think, or even realize how much of what I thought was one simple decision on my part, would influence so many others. How terrible I feel for the pain I inflicted upon them. I was not the only one who was going to miss out on raising my son; my family would miss out on a nephew, a grandson, and a cousin. I would never have imagined the pain and suffering they would go through because of my decision. They supported me through my decision, and let
it be MY decision. I was not forced into placing my son, and was not judged by them.

I tell my story to educate - so adoptive parents and all who want to know, can hear of a birthmother's love. I will always love my son, and will now always be a mother -- I'm just not a parent, yet. I can stand tall knowing I walked through my own personal fire, and put my child's best interests above my own wants. He will have the best life I could offer, and I will always love him and his parents with all of my heart.

There is no mystery in adoption, only what we allow. It is a wonderful thing, painful, but worth it. It is truly about love.
Shared with Love,
Heather

Now, onto answering the flow of questions that have been asked:

~ How old were you when you had your son?

I was 27 when I had Dylan. I conceived him on my birthday (January 14th). Coincidentally, it was also the very weekend I met my birthmother for the first time.

~ What brought you to the decision to place?

It was VERY hard. Incredibly hard. Anyone who knows me is aware of my love for children. I’ve always planned on having a “herd” of kids. I’ve always been the one who others could count on to take care of their kids if they needed it, or if an emergency popped up. I had taken every class I could to prepare me to be a mother, and had grand plans in mind for when the glorious occasion arouse. But, as things in life sometimes go – things in my life don’t always go according to plan (or according to my own schedule).

There were lots of different factors which finally brought me to this final decision. Most of them were centered on providing the best living circumstances for my son. I was older (27) and knew I could provide for his physical needs. I wanted the very best situation for him – the same situation I had been given. I wasn’t willing to marry his birth father, and I knew that even if we were able to work together, we still wouldn’t provide him with the best environment. There were too many differences between us with how we wanted him to be raised. After finally realizing that the best thing for him might not be to be raised by me, I started looking into adoption.

~ Was it hard?

Finally coming to the decision, choosing to select his parents, and holding onto my decision was very hard. None of it was harder than actually doing it though. It truly felt as if I was tearing my heart in half, wrapping it up into a tender soft blanket and passing it onto someone else.

~ Do you regret your decision?
Over the years, I have often thought back to my decision. At times of sadness, or depression, I’ve wondered if I had made the right decision. I think back to my life then, and then to my life now. He could easily have been a part of both. But, I always realize that I made the best decision I could possibly make for my son. Does it make the hurt any less? Not a single bit. My heart still aches for him. This decision wasn’t about me. It was then, and remains still, the best thing for him.

~ How do you deal with it emotionally?

Wow. Honestly, sometimes I don’t. I’m really good at blocking out emotions. To an extent everyone is – you have to be to survive. When I see a cute little boy, who is around the same age as my son – I think of him. When I see a new born baby being blessed - I think of him. Mothers Day is hard, but I’m learning to celebrate and enjoy in other’s blessings. Sometimes I shed a tear (or two… or shower them). Normally though, on the average day, when I think of him… I look at the photos his parents are kind enough to share with me, and I smile. It’s not always easier to smile, but it sure is prettier – don’t you think?

~ How could you have done such a thing?
When I realized it was best for him – how could I not? Choosing to keep him for myself would have been undeniably selfish and detrimental to him.

~ How could you have done this to your parents and other family?
Did my family suffer? Most definitely. My choice to place him eliminated their opportunity to have another nephew, grandchild, and cousin to spoil. Was it hard for them to handle? Most definitely. I was repeatedly asked if I might reconsider, if I was sure, and other ways of asking the same question. Most definitely. Did they try to dissuade me? Once I had made my decision – not once. In the end, and during the process, they supported me in my decision making process and even agreed with me. My family has always been and continues to be an incredible pillar of support for me in my life. At times when I’ve needed sometime to rely on – my family has always been there and I believe will always be there for me. Yes, there are those members of my family who still do not agree (or understand) with the decision I made, but they continue to love me nonetheless.

~ How did your parents respond to your decision?

With much prayer, tears, and love, they supported me with the decision I made. Not once did they apply any pressure to me, to choose one way or another. They truly supported me as I worked my way towards making the decision to place him. My mother attended each doctor’s appointment with me, and was even in the delivery room as he entered the world. She came with me and looked at potential family profiles. They cried with me when I was struggling, laughed with me when he kicked me, and put up with all of my hormonal tirades and cravings.

~ Did your decision change how your family reacts or acts towards you?

Not at all. My family loves me just as much as they did before. They continue to support me through the various changes I’ve made in my life, and continue to love me regardless.

~ Did you choose his parents? How did you choose them? How did you know they were the ones you wanted him to be with? What made you choose them? Was it hard?
It was HARD!!! Literally, I was choosing his life – his whole life. The decision I was making would likely determine what kind of boy he would be; what kind of man he would become. When I made the decision to place him, I met with an agency worker. I explained some of the characteristics I wanted them to have (musical, intelligent, educated, culinary inclined, had seen parts of the world – things I liked in myself) and she did a basic search for me. We met and she handed me a stack of profiles for me to look through. Each profile included basic general information (family traits, height/weight/hair color, basic ancestry, education, etc), a “Dear Birthparent” letter, and a photo collage. Being a scrap booker, I always looked at the photo collage first. I wasn’t looking at how they laid it out – I really was interested in the photos. I wanted to SEE their faces.

Interestingly, the first profile I looked at was of Becky and Owen and immediately I felt an unexplainable bond with them. I remember specifically looking at their profile, and thinking it was cool that he had been to Europe, and that they were both musically inclined. I don’t remember specifically why, but I set them aside and went onto the other profiles. However, when I had finished them all, I asked the worker for additional profiles, and kept theirs.

I went through over 150 other profiles – much more than the average birthparent for the agency I used. I had narrowed the profiles down to two families. They both had so much to offer my little man. Both families wanted a child to love. They both had all of the qualities I desired, and were able to provide for his needs. I knew they would both be great families for him. I was torn between the two until one day when I noticed something I had not noticed before.

I have always been a heavy girl, always always always. It wasn’t until one night as I was lying in bed (thinking about all of the weight I had gained) when I looked over to the backside of one of the profiles, and saw the weight of the mother. It was by far less than I weighed when I became pregnant, but more than typical “average” woman. I immediately felt a closer bond with her, and was proud that she had put her weight on there. I loved the fact that she was just a little more like me. Over the coming weeks as I pondered whether or not I had chosen the right family and each time I felt a quiet reassurance that they were indeed the family he should be with.

~ Do you communicate with his parents? Do you get to see photos of your son?

We communicate as needed, or as wanted. We share what is commonly known as a semi-open adoption and it borders right on the brink of an open adoption. I know who his parents are, where they live, and generally what goes on in their life. They’ve created a family website (a blog really) for their family to visit and see what’s going on in their life. They share photos, and various information and updates about their life, Dylan’s life, and just life overall in general. Becky has a blog (like I do) to share her favorite recipes. They visit my blogs, and are aware of what I’m up to and what’s going on in my life too.

I do get to see photos of him – and I’m so glad. I know many birthparents don’t receive photos or updates (hopefully either by their request or choice) because it’s easier for them (emotionally, mentally, etc.) I love seeing photos of Dylan – seeing him happy makes me happy and is another reaffirmation that I made the right decision for him.

~ Do you attend parties and other family functions with him and his parents?

No. We currently share a semi-open adoption arrangement, and a little more open than most semi-open adoptions. The opportunity is there to open our adoption further, should the situation arise or necessitate. However, it was (and remains) important to me that Becky and Owen focus on their family with Dylan and not on involving me into their family. I believe it to be essential that Dylan realize that I am not his mother. I’m how he got here (to life, to earth, etc), in who’s tummy he grew, but not who is his mother. I don’t want to confuse him.

It is my opinion that genetics doesn’t determine who a child’s parents are; it’s who cares for them and tends to their needs. I’m sure many of you have multiple mothers. I know I do. I have the mother who gave me life (Sheri), and the mother who raised me and tended to my every need (Mom or Mary). I will forever be a mother, but I may not ever be a parent.

~ How do you feel about others who have chosen to parent instead of place their children for adoption? What are your feelings towards single mothers (young or otherwise)?

First, I believe it to be very sad that our society is not more open and supportive about adoption. I find it very disheartening that it’s not discussed openly, and that it’s not normally presented as an option to young single parents. I’ve never seen it discussed on a talk show (and believe me I watched PLENTY of them while I was pregnant), and the first time I’ve ever heard it mentioned on television was during season one of Grey’s Anatomy when Izzy discussed her decision to place her child for adoption. Generally, the only options presented are abortion or parenting.

That being said, I believe that single parents need all of the love and support we can realistically provide them. It is a very hard job, and normally it’s a hard life for all involved. Single parents (especially young single parents) need to have educational programs (life and parenting skills) and higher learning opportunities available to them so that they can be prepared to provide for themselves and for their families (but not freely given to the extent of where they are taken for granted or abused). I believe we all have the right to choose. Obviously we make some choices that are better than others and each individual’s situation is different. I don’t harbor any ill will towards anyone who chooses to parent their child rather than placing. Every situation is different. My choice was to place.

~ How did his birthfather react?

Dylan’s birthfather initially did not agree with my decision to place Dylan. In fact, he went so far as to pursue legal rights. It was his belief that by not agreeing to the adoption, he would gain full and complete custody of our son. This was a situation which would never have happened. I did not make my decision based on whether or not I wanted to parent – I made the decision because I believed (and continue to believe) that it was in the very best interests of our son.

~ What happened to his birth father?

In the end, he completely disappeared. He didn’t show up to court proceedings. He didn’t return phone calls. He didn’t continue with any interest in our child. He willingly had his parental rights terminated. I later was able to get in touch with him, to see if he was interested in photos or other information and he has chosen to not receive those items.

~ What’s it like being adopted?
I can’t compare being adopted with what it’s like to not be adopted. My parents didn’t treat me any differently than they did my sister and brothers. The only time a difference arose was when “birth” stories were shared. I, obviously, was the easiest delivery my mother has ever experienced. I was, however, the most expensive delivery my parents ever had. My parents picked me up from the hospital, and I’ve never known any other. I've always felt VERY loved.

When I was younger, I loved telling people I was adopted. It’s something special for me. Most people aren’t given the chance to have two families, or the ability to say “My parents chose me.” Of course, when I was being a smart aleck to kids who were teasing me about being adopted, I was able to use the response of “My parents chose me, but your parents were stuck with you.”

I look very much like my family, both biological and adoptive. As you can see in the photo of me and my two mothers, I have characteristics of both (and in case you’re wondering, Sheri is on the left and my mom is on the right). If someone hadn’t told you I was adopted – you would never have known. I can’t begin to tell you how many people have challenged me on whether I was adopted or not.

~ How did you find your birthmother?
I didn’t. She found me. Over the years, she had tried various search methods to find me. In the end, it was a search angel from a website (www.bighugs.com) who found me. I came home from work in July of 2001 to a message on my answering machine. I remember the person mentioning something about classmates.com and needing help completing a puzzle. I assumed it was someone from high school looking for me. So, I returned her call leaving a message with additional contact information. I didn’t hear anything back, so I assumed she had found the help she needed with her puzzle – and I completely forgot all about her call.

That is, until September 5th when I returned to work after the Labor Day weekend. A voicemail message was waiting for me from the search angel. When I returned her call, I remember her asking me a few different questions which seemed really strange and personal. She knew things like where and when I was born – and that I was placed for adoption. My mind was spinning with questions as to who this woman was, why she knew so much about me, and why she wanted to talk to me.

Finally, after answering all of her questions, she said, “I’m conducting this search on behalf of a woman who placed her daughter for adoption. In the county she delivered in, there were three children placed for adoption in the same month. Two were boys. She delivered in the same county you were born in.”

I remember suddenly feeling overwhelmed, curious, and freaked out all at the same time. I asked if she would share the name of the woman she was searching for, and she said she needed to obtain permission to release that information.

Then, I asked her if the woman’s name was Sheri Cash. She started to stammer. I knew that this woman had been searching for me on behalf of my birthmother. She started asking me how I knew her name. I explained that I had always known her name. She asked if I was interested in talking with the woman she was searching on behalf of. I, obviously, agreed. After a miss or two (the searcher passed on my work number instead of my home number), Sheri and I finally got to talk for the first time.

~ How did you learn your birthmother’s name?
When my parents went to pay for the hospital bill when I was born, they stood behind a young blonde woman who was standing with an older gentleman. After the couple in front of them had finished, and they explained to the hospital clerk what they needed to do, the clerk responded that the bill had just been paid by the couple who had been in front of them. The clerk, shared the name of the patient (on accident I assume – nowadays it would be a huge HIPPA violation), and so my parents learned my birthmothers name. They’ve never hidden it from me. I don’t remember when they shared her name with me – it seems as if I’ve always known it. (FYI: The older gentleman was my great grandfather.)

~ What was it like talking to your birthmother for the first time?

Cool. Overwhelming. Scary. Emotional. Educational. Awesome – and so much more. I remember getting off of the phone with the searcher and starting a list of questions I wanted to make sure I asked Sheri. I had pages and pages of questions. Hundreds of questions.

I remember one of the first questions I asked her (I can’t believe I’m admitting this) was…. How big was her butt? Seriously. What kind of question is that? I had a HUGE butt (ghetto bootie as it was affectionately termed) and wanted to know if I had inherited it.

During our first (of many) phone calls, I remember trying to remember every word she said; trying to remember her voice, her accent – everything about it just in case it didn’t happen again. It was such a great experience. I learned so much about her and about myself too. It really was awesome.

~ What kind of relationship do you have with your birthparents? What about the rest of your birth family.

My birthmother, Sheri, and I share a fun friendly relationship. She’s known as my “other mother”, a term she coined herself. We chat on the phone, and we email. She (and her family) reads my blog. It has been a blessing to have her in my life. After placing me, she was able to have a son (David) who is my half brother.

My birthfather, Bob, is not a part of my life by his own choice. When Sheri shared that she had “found me” with him, he didn’t have anything to say. When trying to imagine how he felt about the situation, here’s what I’ve come up with (I came up with this before having Dylan – and it still makes sense to me): When placing a child, part of you is gone. Men (in general) try to block things out. So, I imagine that in his mind (and to cope) he acted as if I was dead. Learning that I was alive and well, 25+ years after I was gone from his life would be very overwhelming. I imagine that it would be hard to deal with, and easier to avoid; which is the route he chose. I don’t blame him for his choice – nor do I hold it against him. Again, we all have our free agency to make choices, and that’s the choice he made. Would I welcome the opportunity to meet him? Of course! But, am I wallowing in pity because that opportunity is not available to me? No. Bob later had a daughter (Brittany) who doesn’t know I exist.

Sheri’s family has been incredibly warm, welcoming and loving to me. They’ve opened their arms and have accepted me as part of their family as if I was never gone. It has been incredible getting to know them, and having a whole additional family to love and to be loved by. I have a great grandmother (June) who is alive and well. Grandparents (Jim and Linette) who are active, happy, fun and loving. Aunts and Uncles (Candy, Oliver – and many others) who are way cool, and make me want to be like them when I grow up. I am very blessed to know them – and to have them in my life.

Do I do much with them? No, not really. I think of them often – and have very fond memories of our time together. Managing my life, my newly married life (and a few extra arms of family), and my family is hard. I wish I had more time to spend with all of my family – Sheri’s family included. I’ve made a goal (I’m really good at setting them and no where near as good at following through) of getting out to visit them next year (whether it’ll be Oregon or Mississippi – I don’t know).

~ How did your parents respond to your birthmother finding you?
Initially, I was VERY nervous about telling them. Over the years, we had openly discussed me looking for my birthmother. My parents had always said they would support me if I ever decided to search. Never did they once try to dissuade me (notice a pattern? They’ve always been supportive of me – in EVERYTHING). After I had gotten the call from the search angel, I knew I needed to tell my parents.

At the time, I was living in Ohio, and they were living in Texas. I didn’t know how they would react. I expected my dad to take it cool and in stride (which is how he handles almost EVERYTHING) and I expected my mother to get emotional but be supportive.

I called my dad (at work) first, because I figured he could break the news to my mom for me (I’m such a coward sometimes). After telling him of the news, he asked me how I felt about it (which is very typical of my father). I explained to him how I was feeling – emotionally, mentally and how I knew this was going to change my reality. He was very supportive and mostly concerned with me and how I was handling it all. I explained to him that I was worried about telling my mother. He helped to prepare me (in case she freaked), he shared his love for me, and we ended our call.

I waited a few hours to call mom. I honestly thought Dad would break the news to her, to prepare her. He didn’t.

I remember calling her at home, doing a bit of idle chit chat, and asking her if she was sitting down. Then, I asked her if she was sitting in a comfy place – and requesting that she relocate to a comfy place. After she had done so, I explained the recent turn of events, and waited for her response. She, like my father, asked how I was handling everything and was concerned about me. Then, as I asked her how she felt about it all – she gave me the response I will never, ever forget.

She said, “Heather, there is enough love in this world for everyone.”

My parents have lived by that statement in almost everything they do. They have supported me in my relationship with Sheri and her family. They have opened their arms to Sheri and have accepted her as part of my life – openly.

~ Do your parents and your birthmother get along?

My parents and Sheri have only met on one occasion – my wedding. My parents are very welcoming and inviting people. When the day came for them to meet (the day before my wedding – talk about stress!!! Seriously… stressful!), they all opened their arms to each other and hugged. Of course, there were many emotions, tears, and words shared but it was a positive experience all the way around. I could not have asked for a better meeting (well… maybe not the day before my wedding.).

My parents also got to meet Sheri’s mother, my grandmother, Linette, at my wedding. Again, emotions, tears, and words – but a very positive experience!

~ Have your feelings about adoption changed?
Changed from what? I think adoption is great! It’s hard (on the birthparent side), it’s awesome (on the adopted child side). It’s an incredible blessing to everyone involved. I’m a major advocate for adoption.

~ Will you have other children? Will you adopt children?

In response to both questions, that remains to be seen.

It is my doctor’s medical opinion (more than one doctor) that it’s a miracle I ever conceived in the first place. I have extreme endometriosis and I also have poly cystic ovarian syndrome (PCOS). It has been recommended to me (on more than one occasion) that I should seriously consider having a hysterectomy. Until it becomes a medical necessity for me to do so, I will continue to harbor my female organs.
I have faith that the Lord will bless me with a family. How, exactly, that family will come is unbeknownst to me. The Lord works in mysterious ways. I know that He is mindful of me, my wishes, and my dreams. I know that His timing is perfect and that mine is not.

If the opportunity to adopt is ever presented to me, I would gladly jump at the chance to parent.

Would you mind sharing the scrapbook you created for your son?
I have been working on this scrapbook for over 4 years – and it’s STILL not done. Seriously. I can’t even begin to count the hours I’ve put into it. Each time I sit down to work on it, I get overwhelmed with emotions – and perfection. It’s a work in progress. Once I have it completed, I’ll gladly share portions.

Okay, there you have it folks. Answers to all of your adoption questions from my perspective – that of a birthmother and of an adopted child. I’m sure more questions will arise out of my answers, and I welcome the opportunity to answer them. There truly is no mystery in adoption.

Love,
~heather